For the man
who’s given himself
to provide life to another
and placed his joy
in the hearts of his children –
those which beat on this earth,
those whose measure
are yet to be,
and those that have silently
passed to be carried
in the rhythm of our own.
for Calvin
I will keep you in my heart and carry you there each day. And when I am in my deepest of grieving, my son, I will remember the morning I held you in my arms and saw you in your father’s. In those brief hours, the world stopped in silence and honored us. Time stopped and let our family be whole. And the pain of losing you fell away, like gossamer carried away on a passing breeze. For a moment—a moment that is enough, yes, enough to sustain me through the many, many days of living I must endure without you—I forgot the feeling of loss. You filled my heart. You fill it still.
In two days, we had to write a script, film, score, and edit a 4-7 minute film in the genre that we randomly pulled, that included the following elements:
The genre we ended up with was “Family Film” (randomly drawn).
Stuff I worked on include the script, hair & makeup, and some photo-editing. I hope you enjoy watching it at least half as much as I enjoyed working on this project.
I know I can’t
make you whole again
But I’m here.
I’m here to catch
your tears in the palms of my hand,
to try to make the landing a little less
rough
when you fall,
because I’m falling,
too. So I’ll go down with you,
and,
when we are
ready, we can
help one another climb
back up, when we are ready,
but only then.
And if you are never
ready
to let go
of our child, of our baby,
know that it’s okay because I can’t
let Calvin go, either,
at least not in the way of forgetting
or letting ourselves lose
him to the aching of our grief.
grey overwhelms blue
without my light, my sweet son
wet fog surrounds me
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